I like being right, maybe more than the average Four. Being right is my savior, my safety, my means of coping, and honestly, my compensation. How wrong is that I enjoy the dividends of being right?! And naturally, like He always does, God has been speaking to me about my pesky habit. I just finished the book Letting Go of the Need to Be Right by Jeff Dollar and it wrecked my life. Through Jeff's book, I took a closer look at my dear friend, Naaman. Naaman's story and his complete hissy fit can be found in 2 Kings chapter 5. Did I mention that I love Naaman for the fact that he did have a straight up hissy fit and lost his mind on some people after he was told to dip seven times in the Jordan river? People like Naaman give me hope. Naaman had leprosy and he needed a miracle. He got word that he should go to Israel and see a prophet there named Elisha. Naaman went to see Elisha with certain expectations in mind, and I think many of us have expectations for what we think God is going to do, and how He is going to do it. Much to Naaman's chagrin, he is not met by Elisha, but instead by a messenger. Naaman was angry. He had come a long way and he was insulted that the prophet did not even have the decency to come out and speak to him directly.
"But Naaman went away angry and said, 'I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the Lord his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy. Are not Abana and Pharpar, the rivers of Damascus, better than all the waters of Israel? Couldn't I wash in them and be cleansed? So he turned and went off in a rage" (2 Kings 5: 11-12 NIV). I can relate to Naaman because I can recount times that I have stepped out in faith and truly trusted God, and I felt like He let me down. There was a season of my life not so long ago that I was literally ready to call the whole thing off.I was ready to go back to Egypt because the promised land was not what I felt like He promised me. I was so disappointed in God that I could not fake it, or sugar coat my responses or my face when I was around people. I might have even said something to the effect of I thought God took care of the anointed ones... Looking back, I can see how proud I was but at the time, there was no telling me any different and watch out if you tried. I would tell you what I had rehearsed in my car talking to myself believing this is what I would say to anyone who asked! I think what finally shook me hard enough to wake up and see what I was doing wrong, was when God asked me-
Do you want to be teachable or be right? Do you want to learn and grow from this, or do you just want to be right?
Did I mention that God is smart aleck? Here's the deal, friend, God never promised that I'd get what I want, that my days would be easy, that just because I chose to follow Him I wouldn't suffer, or that He'd let me skip the bad parts of life. And where I think disappointment comes in for most of us, is when I confuse what I think God owes me with what He actually told me. His direction to rejoice always and give thanks in all circumstances is not situational, it's continual.
Naaman was desperate for God. He came looking for a miracle and in the end, walked away insulted. The Jordan was polluted and often was full of raw sewage... SAY WHAT?!! YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT?!
It comforts me to see someone throw a temper tantrum in front of people. Naaman was mad and he acted out in his frustration. Linda Dillow in her book, Calm My Anxious Heart, talks about how anger comforts us. She says that "if I remain angry, then I have no room in my mind to find fault in myself. If I stay angry, I never have to admit that I did anything wrong and thereby have no part of the blame."
DO YOU WANT TO BE RIGHT, OR BE AT REST?
I believe I am doing all the right things. I am a godly woman. I attend church. I tithe. I work really hard to provide for my family. I serve and I pray for people. I work so hard at doing the right things, so if someone is wrong in a given situation, I have a hard time understanding it could be me. Where we mess up, is we become keen at identifying other people's faults and defects to minimize or not recognize our own. Boom. Sometimes being stuck has everything to do with me. I walk around with an attitude of dishonor. I am a co-laborer with Christ, not a co-star. If everyone stopped at being right, none of us would get anywhere. The need to be right divides families. It keeps you from knowing your birth father or your paternal grandfather. It allows fathers and sons to go a year and counting without speaking. When we are on our deathbed, the need to be right goes out the window. Instead, we care about mending, saying what we should have said. What if that looked more like dying to self everyday?
What I love about Naaman too, is eventually he allowed his servants to speak some truth to him and he actually received that truth. Naaman was teachable- there was something in his heart that allowed him to receive correction. What if we allowed God to do what He wants to do, in the way He wants to do it? God resists you when you are proud, but continually pours out grace when you are humble (James 4:6 TPT).
Being teachable is not all about receiving information, it is about whom you can receive information from -- it's the ability to bend.
What I love about Jesus and His example, is what He did not do and did not say. In the times He could have fought for his own rightness, He submitted. In Luke 2, when He stayed behind at the temple in Jerusalem, he was respectful to his parents. He didn't jump on his chance to tell His mom how important He was, but scripture says "he went down to Nazereth with them, and was continually submissive and obedient to them." It is more valuable to come under authority than it is to be right. The bible goes on to say that as a result, Jesus kept increasing in wisdom and stature and favor with God and man. If Jesus, the son of God, needed to grow in favor with God, how more do I need to do the same?
I read a quote by Wayne Stiles recently and it still has me shaking my head in the way you do when truth smacks you: "Our inability to understand God should give cause for worship, not for doubt."
What if we asked ourselves if we could let Jesus love us enough that we could be wrong and that would be okay? Or if we could love others enough to let them be right?
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